God Is Faithful

Years ago during the long and difficult process of adopting our sons from Haiti, the lyrics and harmonies of one song in particular echoed the cries of my heart:

Deep is the river that I have to cross

Heavy the weight on my shoulder

I have discovered how great is the cost

Of trying alone to cross over

I try and I try, but the current's too strong

It's pulling me under, and my strength is gone

Don't leave me stranded

Rescue me, my God and my King

Water is rising, and I cannot breathe

Wrap your arms all around me and

Carry me over (rescue me)

Carry me over

(Selah, 2007)

Over a decade and a half has passed, during which time both beautiful and harrowing experiences have taken place in our family's life and ministry. We now find ourselves in a poignant stage of parenting young adult children with all the emotional complexities this entails. Nothing prepared us for how hard - really, really hard - it is to be thousands of miles away from our son or daughter when fear or heartbreak, confusion or disappointment comes.

Nothing prepared us for hearing things like: "Mom, I'm in so much pain that I feel like I'm going to die. Someone is taking me to the emergency room." Or: "Dad, first of all I am okay. But I had a car accident and the police came." Or: "I love you and I am proud of the work you do for God, but I feel SO ALONE ..." as wracking sobs echo across the line.

Earlier today, I told a missionary friend this. Everything that happens with young adult MK children makes you weigh the same questions over and over again: Are we doing the right thing by staying on the field or are we supposed to leave for their benefit? Are we choosing ministry over family, or are we remaining faithful to a call and trusting our children's lives to God?

I often think back to the early church and to the current persecuted church, where teaching your children to follow God meant/means suffering and quite possibly death. How do parents even do that? And how does that apply to our situation (if indeed it does?) 

Do we only stay on the field while our children are comfortable and safe? Or do we trust that the hard things that they face, and the ministry hurt that wounds them, even the danger and peril that may come, and certainly the distance that is a huge daily loss when they move away, is part of God's plan for us AND for them?

I don't have answers to any of these questions. I do have Scripture, which tells me that Jesus said, "Truly, I say to you, there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or lands, for my sake and for the gospel, who will not receive a hundredfold now in this time, houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and lands, with persecutions, and in the age to come eternal life." (Mark 10:29-30)

And I have the comfort that God - the perfect Father - and Jesus - His perfect Son - know exactly how painful this separation is. For thirty-three years they lived much farther apart from one another than even the thousands of miles we face. God has not asked us to do something He was not willing to do first.

God is faithful. Time and time again He has come to the rescue of our children when we have been far away. He has summoned His people to stand in for us when Mom and Dad couldn't make orientation, or Christmas, or provide a safe place to land when life didn't work out as planned. He has sent comforters in times of sorrow, counselors in times of confusion, and caregivers in times of pain. 

As in the lyrics to the song above, we have discovered for our family that trying alone is too great a cost. We need to be rescued by our God and our King, Who chooses to do so oftentimes by means of His other servants. Sometimes we need to be carried, and always He sends us strong arms. God is faithful, and for that I am so grateful.