Yesterday, Nathan (of Nathan & Tricia at http://www.cfhusband.blogspot.com/) posted an urgent prayer update for another family whose baby boy was arriving prematurely.
I visited the Stanfield family's blog (http://www.thestanfieldjourney.blogspot.com/) and quickly learned that there was so much more to their story - a story much like Nathan & Tricia's in its courage, heartbreak, and faith in the sovereignty of God.
You see, while the Stanfield family is preparing to say hello to their baby boy ... they are also preparing to say goodbye. Their baby boy, Maddox, was diagnosed in utero with Trisomy 18 and spina bifida.
20 weeks into her pregnancy, Kenzie Stanfield wrote the following:
Why is this our journey to walk? How does this fit in with my plan for how life was supposed to go? I don't think that I will ever fully understand those questions, and about a billion more... but I DO KNOW with full confidence that this is ours to walk, they are not my plans, and it IS from the Lord. He has entrusted us with this life to love and protect... and then eventually give back to Him. I am mentally preparing for that... but can you ever be prepared to let your own child go? Would Mary have said to the angel Gabriel "I am the Lord's servant... May it be to me as you have said" if she would have known all that Jesus was going to suffer in his death? It must have been terribly painful to watch, something that shook her to the core... and yet her son saved the world. She understood that although she was entrusted with this child, ultimately, he belonged to the Father, and he would eventually return to Him. Her son died so that mine, my Maddox, will live eternally. What an amazing gift!
...I know that many have walked this road before us, and sadly many will walk it after us, but we are so confident in the Lord and the purpose in all of this. God knew the exact child he was creating for us and He never makes mistakes. When I read Psalm 139, I can't help but think of this sweet boy we are expecting: "For you created my inmost being, you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."
In today's society, doctors are quick to encourage heartbroken parents to terminate their pregnancies when a child is diagnosed with this condition. Their reasons are sincere, believing that to carry the baby to term will only increase a family's bond to their child and then their subsequent grief. Yet as I followed the links from the Stanfield family's blog to other blogs of families who have lost children to Trisomy 18, I was incredibly moved by the joy they expressed in having known their child - whether for 1 hour or 12 hours, or even 50 days or more.
Their joy, of course, is coupled with great sorrow and loss. These families have been irrevocably changed ... their faith deepened ... their empathy multiplied. They have valuable insights to share on the sustaining grace of God and the priceless value of any life.
Today, please especially remember the Stanfield family in your prayers!
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