Friday, February 16, 2007

The Weight of the Wait

It is hard to explain the highs and lows of the "waiting" part of adoption to someone who has not experienced it. Suffice it to say that those who believe adopting is the "easy" way to build a family are quite mistaken! Though adoptive parents do not experience the physical pains of labor, they do experience the excruciating pains of emotional labor throughout a "pregnancy" that often lasts far beyond nine months.

It is not to say that every single day of the wait is that hard. But as days turns into weeks, weeks into months, and months into years, the "weight" of the wait can become so heavy on our hearts. I have found this to be true even during this, our fourth adoption. Part of the reason may be that I assumed I had "been there, done that" and knew what to expect this time around. But I am learning that just as a physically expectant mom must labor for each of her children born biologically, I must labor for each of the children born into my heart.

As I was thinking about this, I ran across an essay entitled "Biblical Encouragement for Those in Waiting." The author, Melissa, wrote sentiments straight from my heart. For instance:

To be honest, I'm not sure how I would have sustained sanity without my faith in Christ and His ability during the dark period in my life of waiting to be a mother.

And also:

I know the wait for a child to come home can be a lonely one that few people can understand.

However, she framed those feelings around God's goodness and how much He cares for us during those dark times:

Perhaps the most inspirational book of the Bible for me during this time was the Book of Psalms. David committed sins beyond what most of us have, was loved by God and said to be a man after God's own heart. During my own time of waiting, as the enemy would fill me with doubt, in reading how the Lord heard the cries of David during his own trials and waits, I knew God was near and heard my cries to Him too.

To read Melissa’s full article, visit

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